Newlywed Advice from Barn Brides

I love this sweet post from last year! Since Valentine's Day is just a few days away, I wanted to share again some of our former brides' advice for newlyweds. Read every single word of this post... it's a good one! xoxo

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Happy Valentine's Day/Singles Awareness Day/Galentine's Day/whatever you're celebrating this weekend! To celebrate, I asked a few of our former Barn Brides for a little bit of love advice... Specifically, how to make it through those first months and years as husband and wife! I looooved these ladies' answers! If you're a newlywed, planning your wedding, dating, still looking, or even if you've been married a long, long time, be sure to read their words of wisdom. These girls have figured out how to make it work. :) 

"The best thing that worked for us is to display wedding pictures, your unity symbol that was used. We had the painting with our date written on it. This could easily be replaced by your marriage license, but our unity painting that we made together reminded us that one or the other could leave after separating the paint into separate bottles again! Of course this wasn't a simple fix. In the mean time while we figured out ways to separate the paint and make it like it was before, we 'forced' each other to meet up to celebrate our 'monthi-versiaries!' We would go eat at Pizza Hut. The first restaurant we went to eat for our first date. (Even if we didn't want pizza). ONE RULE: leave our phones in the car. But once we were there, we couldn't help but reminisce about how we met and how we even got here, or why we fell in love. These monthi-versaries are so important to us!" - Tang

"The best piece of advice we ever got came from my grandmother. She told me to never listen to anyone else. We both come from large, involved families, and Granny knows how much of a people pleaser I am. She reminded me that every couple and every relationship is unique, and, while asking for advice is okay, we need to always do what is best for our own relationship. That bit of advice has helped us out, not only in our marriage but also as we made the shift into parenthood. Another important piece of advice I'd share: always be willing to be naked. Not just in the physical sense (we all know that's good for a marriage :p) but -maybe more importantly- in the emotional sense. Be willing to be open and honest about the highest of highs, your lowest of lows, and everything in between. I've always made my 'crazy' apparent; I wanted to make sure that Dakota was marrying the real me. That way he wouldn't run for the hills when it turned up- and it will, it always does! Open, honest, 'naked' emotions and communication are essential to a healthy and happy marriage." - Kortney

"The main one is to ALWAYS put God first. Everything will fall into place after that. You may not like each other every day but you can choose to love each other." - Lisa

J. Millwood Photography, from Kaleena + Spencer's wedding

J. Millwood Photography, from Kaleena + Spencer's wedding

"Never stop pursuing one another. Sustain love in the same way you sought to cultivate it and never forget why you fell for one another. Fan the flames of love by loving on purpose. Live selflessly; your marriage's greatest obstacle is selfishness. Share life with one another, considering each other's needs. Communicate meaningfully, touch affectionately, give abundantly, encourage daily, and serve humbly. Never allow a negative moment to dominate the positivity of your marriage. Love is a daily choice. We believe Jesus set the greatest example for how to love, and we hope our marriage glorifies Him." - Kaleena

"We would say go to bed at the same time, take time each night to talk about your days and connect. Always say hello and goodbye with either a hug or a kiss." - Cathryn

"Our biggest piece of advice came from a book my mother in law bought both of us before we got married - Love and Respect. It speaks on if a woman doesn't feel loved she won't show her husband respect, and if a husband doesn't feel respected, he won't show love to his wife. We both read the book before marriage and it has saved us a TON of arguments. If I feel like he isn't being loving or 'fighting fair' I've always been able to state 'I'm not feeling loved right now' which is my key statement to him or he will say 'I'm not feeling respected.' Anytime either one of us say those key statements we discuss right then and apologize before our argument even begins. We hardly ever argue because of this. We both agree couples need a key statement to help them reflect on the big picture instead of something petty that is happening right then. If a couple can do this, they can conquer the world together in harmony!" - Lyndsey

Whatever you're celebrating this weekend, I hope you feel loved, and I hope you get a lot of chocolate! 

xoxo,
Kelsi